“Sorry, not sorry, diet trap. I’d say it’s been fun but I’ve wasted too much time and energy on you. It’s time to let go. I have big things to accomplish and you’re just getting in the way of my best life. I’m sure you’ll tempt me when I’m feeling down but I know in my heart it’s always too good to be true. I want freedom and you can’t offer me that. Never could. By saying no to you, I’m saying yes to myself and that feels amazing. I know what’s best for me and I will trust in myself as I never have before. I’ve never been more certain that this path will help me find peace, true health and balance for a lifetime. Your lies have fooled me for the last time. I have everything I need. ME!”
As we begin a new year, I’ve been reflecting on my past and how I got here. Last year I gave up diets forever. I was tired of the restriction and guilt. It was exhausting spending every waking moment thinking about food, what I can and can’t eat and if the next time I step on the scale, it will show a lower number.
I now feel a sense of freedom I haven’t felt in decades. I go about my day and eat when I feel hungry and stop when I’m full. I don’t plan my meals hours or days in advance. I eat what sounds good. Now, when I eat a ‘trigger’ food from my past, I connect with my body to see how it makes me feel. My new truth is that most of the time, my comfort foods aren’t all that comforting anymore.
That makes me feel both happy and sad. I never thought I’d get to a place where I could take or leave some of my favorite foods. I thought I would be a slave to them forever; that they would always have the upper hand. Feeling out of control is miserable. But if I’m honest, some of those foods were my friend for a very long time. It’s hard to say goodbye to a lifelong friend.
Who will I be without them? This was painful to consider, but here’s what I came up with:
- I am grateful for that friend. It got me through some rough times. It helped me survive when I didn’t have the coping skills to do it alone.
- I don’t need to shut this friend out of my life forever. We can still enjoy each other from time to time, but it will come from place of choice not necessity.
- They will always be a part of me, of my story. As the saying goes, some friends come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime. I’m happily letting go of this season and have found the freedom I’ve been seeking.
I’m so excited for the new year, a new decade. I’m proud of who I’ve become, the work I’ve done and for the friends who’ve helped me along the way. Without them, I wouldn’t be me. My story would be different. And I love my story. Can’t wait to see what the next chapter holds.